While I like to delude myself that half the majority the fun of those cheeky five glasses of wine is being completely uncaring about how many calories they contain, it seems that others are on a different page.

Namely, the strict regulation of treats page. They are the people who are using the portion control plate and now also the Caloric Cuvée. With a tempting tagline of ‘Indulge by the Ounce’, this is carefree imbibing locked down, put in a straitjacket and sat on the naughty step. For all time.

A US innovation, I’m slightly confused by ounces in drink measures, but to Europeanise it for us, one fluid ounce is just under 30mls, and that equals to 25 calories. Should you want eight ounces, or 240mls – or about a decent sized glass – you’ll be glugging down 200 calories. Which the glass cheerily reminds you of each and every time you top up.

As if all that wasn’t a bitter enough pill to swallow, the thing itself costs TWENTY BLEEDIN’ DOLLARS with extra for shipping.

Maybe I’ll just stick to my regular goblet and forgo the guilt. Chin chin!