Got a 12 Pubs of Christmas you’re honour-bound to attend and the invite specifies you’ve gotta, totally,100% wear a Christmas jumper? 

I hearya, but c’mere to me; who said it had to be of the ‘funky’ ilk? As in, bedecked with hilar slogans like ‘let me take an #elfie’ or ‘piste again’ (the humour). I’m no fan, as I’ve asserted before, but I do recognise the need to make a nod to the season. I’m not scrooge.

So here are three Christmas jumpers even I’d wear. And really, that’s saying *quite* something. Find out what they’re like in the gallery.



Understated, yet festive, this holly-embroidered jumper from Asos is a keeper at €43.

He's known for his embellished clothing, so it's no surprise that Markus Lupfer excels when it comes to gaudy geansais for Christmas. This one's a pain-inducing £322. Yes, Sterling. But it has got a sequinned cat on it, so I guess it's worth it.

By contrast, this Monki number is seriously affordable at €35, brimming with positivity and a nice abstract take on yer more usual festive knit. I'll take it.